Sunday, Sunday! Oh Guilt-Free Sundays!

Sunday is the day people are least likely to judge you for not checking email, answering your phone or even looking at it for that matter. The added benefit of being a wedding photographer is that I have Mondays off too, so there's no Sunday night blues.  A good friend of mine works in an office at which all have agreed to four ten hour days with every Sat/Sun/Mon off. I think this is a perfect schedule. When I work, I work. I work for myself, so I don’t have any co-workers and I’m more of an e-mail person so my phone is almost never ringing. I’m also of an older generation and don’t really “surf” the internet either so this allows for working without distraction and I can go for hours once in a groove. I’m not sure I would like ten hour days for myself, but I think so many people already work ten hour days already, it might be worth it to establish that as an office norm allowing for that three days in a row off. Better yet, 32 hour weeks with maximum efficiency in meetings and how you handle your schedule would probably make for a healthier happier workforce.

Here is what makes my Sundays so incredibly blissful (and they really are):

  • Coffee and the New York Times (paper edition) in bed

  • Most of the time I ride my bike to the farmer’s market after I read the paper

  • Afternoon either hiking or in bed with hubby or more reading

  • Late afternoon cook-a-thon to prep for the week (I’m not a good cook, but it’s a de-stresser for me!

  • Evening hangout with hubby either chatting and listening to music or watching a movie or show

Why is this “unplugged” time so important to me? I mentioned in my latest newsletter that I had an epiphany this Sunday and I owe it not only to my meditation practice (only ten minutes a day on weekdays), but also to this electonics-free time. One reason I love staying home on Sundays with just my hubby (other than maybe a hike or my trip to the farmer’s market) is that it allows for a day with minimal decision-making. I almost never make plans with others and I almost always have the same Sunday schedule. There’s something about being completely relaxed with no distractions and no decisions that can put me in a state of bliss like no other. I don’t have kids or pets, so that definitely helps, but I think even if you had kids and nobody in the household took out their electronics for the day it would be almost the same experience because you would be with the ones you love the most. Or if you’re single, you can learn to love just being by yourself (something I love almost more than being with my husband). This kind of time is precious for renewing energy and for opening your mind to your innermost thoughts and self.

So the epiphany this past Sunday was about writing. A few years ago I had my chart read by the fabulous Leslie McGuirk. I’ve always loved astrology in the sense that it was just fun to read my horoscope when I was a teenager (and even when I came across it as an adult sometimes). But I never really took it too seriously. I saw Leslie speak at Rancho La Puerta and decided since I was going through a career change, I would get my full chart read. It was a fascinating experience. Leslie told me that the following fall I should start writing. I’ve never done well in school and I’ve never considered myself a writer, but have always loved reading. I laughed and said I couldn’t write. Fast forward to that fall and I was starting to promote my first retreats and realized I had to start writing on my blog and social media. It was fun to discover that I actually enjoy writing. I always figured nobody was reading it, but I was having fun anyway. Then I started The Healing Farm newsletters and had to write some more. As I became more comfortable with writing, a funny thing happened. I started thinking about writing a book. It was around this same time Brennan started writing his screenplay and I watched the process as he basically put himself through his own at-home PHD film school program. I was so impressed by his passion and even though he had fits and starts the first year and a half of writing because of the learning curve, eventually he hit his groove and writes almost every day now.

So Sunday morning when I walked by him in the living room, I noticed he was writing and I realized he loves what he does so much now, that he writes on Sunday without prompting and without complaint. It’s just something he wants to do. When the idea is there, he wants to get it down. Doesn’t matter the day. I was a little envious because other than hosting retreats on Sundays without even noticing the day, I’ve never felt like I had a career at which I was happy to work any time or any day. Fast forward a few hours and a blissful afternoon in bed with said husband and suddenly I was bursting with writing ideas. I did get my laptop out so I could write down some of the ideas, but made sure I shut is just as quickly so I could keep to my electronics free day.

Although I still don’t want to work on Sundays because that time off is so important to me, I was happy just to know that someday, somehow, I’m going to combine my dream of The Healing Farm and writing. Maybe it will even be the writing that someday finances The Healing Farm? Who knows, but it’s so good to know that I’m slowly finding my way to the person I was always meant to be. I’m striving in this career transition to find my best self to transcend to another level of living. If I can make it through the fears of failure and taking big leaps of faith (without a lot of financial backing) I think I can get there, I plan on continuing to make my Sundays the day of bliss to further and further open my mind to find the dreamer, creative, happiest Julie that I have ever known.

Join us for the 3rd Act fall retreat and unplug for days so you can start to find ways to find that gem within too! Don’t worry, you’ll have internet in your room, but the rest of the property will be blissfully electronics-free!

Overcoming Adrenal Fatigue - Program Developed by Chris Kresser's Nutritionists - I Guess I'm not REALLY Going Nuts. I'm just N.U.T.S!

I've written a bit about the stress I've been under running an established business, starting this new business (The Healing Farm!), going through a personal family crisis, taking business classes, holidays and on and on. It's really amazing how chronic stress takes its toll no matter how well you take care of yourself with your diet and exercise. I would say I've been going through extreme chronic stress for at least six months - something I will strive to teach people to avoid once The Healing Farm is established, but something that may be unavoidable while I transition my career and try to start this new business. 

When Chris Kresser announced this webinar and program called "Paleo Rehab" that his two nutritionists created I felt like it couldn't have come at a better time. I signed up for the webinar immediately and then woke up yesterday morning feeling like I couldn't get myself out of bed. After completing a ten-week business plan class the night before, I needed to jump right back into room assignments and getting out final link payments for the Mayacamas Ranch retreat participants (plus I'm leaving for a week-long photo shoot out of the country tomorrow!). I was barely (and late) out of bed just settling in with coffee in hand for my morning routine of reading the news, answering light e-mails and my workout when my husband started ranting about something regarding the presidential campaign. As the "f" word started coming out of his mouth, I stopped him and said my psyche couldn't handle a rant at that particular moment. When he looked at me as if I lost my mind, I think I kind of did lose my mind. I broke down into hysterical crying.  This has happened a couple of times over the past few months so he kindly sat down with me and we talked about the amount of constant stress I have been under for the past seven months. He had some really great suggestions like "you need to start thinking about how much you're piling into your schedule" and the fact that I haven't been myself for months (among other things). When I finally calmed down, I opened my calendar and up popped the reminder about the stress webinar! Serendipity.

I decided to take it easy on myself and recognizing that my body and mind were near complete exhaustion, I read the news leisurely and decided I couldn't handle even my NYT Seven Minute workout. By the time I was done reading the news and answering e-mails, it was time for the webninar. I actually enjoyed two hours of much-needed cooking and cleaning time (something I haven't been able to do regularly for months - Brennan has been eating frozen pizzas multiple times per week for dinner for crying out loud) while I listened to Chris, Kelsey (both of whom will be speaking at the Mayacamas Ranch retreat) and Laura talk as if they were using me as their worst case scenario patient. if you went through the N.U.T.S acronym with me -  and here it is from Chris' site:

4 key factors that determine how we respond to stress

So what determines the intensity of our response to a particular stressor? Research has identified four key factors: (1)

  1. The novelty of the event
  2. The unpredictable nature of the event
  3. A perceived threat to our body or ego
  4. A sense of loss of control

Some researchers and clinicians use the acronym N.U.T.S. (novelty, unpredictability, threat, sense of no control) to refer to them. I think that’s perfect!

...I was experiencing all of the above only over multiple events and months. I was also interested to learn that as someone who is in peri-menopause, the symptoms of chronic stress and adrenal fatigue can be intensified and I'm more vulnerable. So I'm not really losing my mind then. I think I'm in some severe adrenal fatigue experiencing these symptoms:

  • Weight gain (I eat with stress and although I eat well, to make it worse, sometimes I can't keep my mitts off of tortilla chips! I get organic, but I'm guessing they are fried in industrial seed oil)
  • Chronic back pain is starting to creep back in
  • Extreme fatigue and although I'm still an overall happy person, depression seems to be creeping in
  • Brain fog - which didn't help with my ten-week course
  • Cold hands and feet (Brennan commented on "Jack Frost Nipping at My Nose" last night too)
  • Skin breakouts
  • Panic, agitation and anxiety
  • A sense of hopelessness and doubt
  • On and on the symptoms matched up with what Chris, Laura and Kelsey were discussing

After the webinar a strange thing happened. I decided that despite it not being a good time for us financially, I needed to tackle this chronic stress and fatigue immediately so it wouldn't cause long-term harm so I committed to going through the program (at my own pace). When I finally got into the office, I answered a phone call from one of the Mayacamas Ranch attendees who told me how inspired she was by what I was trying to do with The Healing Farm. As I've planned these retreats, but especially the Mayacamas Paleo Reset Retreat, I've heard from so many people around the country that this is something that is needed and wanted:

  •  A program that focusses on a paleo reset type diet in which one learns to reduce systemic inflammation, therefore reducing or even eliminating symptoms of chronic pain and illness
  • A program that is reasonably priced
  • and mostly a program that a features realistic non-intense exercise program (and after listening to Chris yesterday I was wishing I had a Tai Chi instructor coming)
  • In a beautiful place where one could go and unplug, rest, gently exercise and eat a meal plan that is non-toxic and inflammation-reducing 

This phone conversation completely validated what I've been trying to accomplish in the past year with The Healing Farm concept. I don't want to kill myself pursuing it, but if I can find the right people to build this dream with me, maybe I can make it a reality. A glimmer of hope set in again yesterday afternoon and I was again thinking of the impeccable timing of the webinar. I decided then that I still didn't have the energy to dig into final payment setup on The Healing Farm site, so went over our personal finances, sorted and filed piles of papers from my desk and then went back into my cozy home to spend the evening with my husband eating the nutritious food I cooked during the webinar, quiet time listening to music together and then a little "business time" on a Wednesday night (a little reference to "Flight of the Conchords"). 

I wish I could say I woke up feeling like a million bucks this morning, but I managed to get myself out of bed at a reasonable time, managed to do my workout and get to work at my regular hour and before tackling The Healing Farm Mayacamas Ranch booking stuff, I'm going to walk out onto the avenue in the warm sunshine to run some errands before leaving town tomorrow. I think it's going to take a while until I can get myself back to the "normal" Julie, but the smartest thing I think I can do for myself right now since the stress won't stop until end of April is sign up for the "Overcoming Fatigue" program and get some much needed guidance and support for my road to recovery. Here is the link in case you want to check it out:

 

Thank you to Laura and Kelsey (and Chris) for doing this important work!